Linking Sexual Harassment To Pornography

Our porn culture has gone mainstream and
become a new norm.

We should find it heartening that more and more men are finally being called out for violating and sexually abusing women. This has undoubtedly been a serious problem for a long time, one that is finally becoming more exposed for the cancer it is--through the MeToo movement and some long overdue prosecutions of offenders.

With men and boys today getting their primary sex education from porn sites rather from morally minded and worthy role models, should it be surprising that we see ever more examples of this kind of inexcusable behavior? And the impressionable age at which boys are first being exposed to porn now averages age 11, according to a recent study, and is believed to be trending to even younger.

The hardwiring effect of this kind of sordid entertainment on a developing brain is, in my opinion, crippling when it comes to men creating stable and satisfying relationships that are for "'til death so us part".

Consider the following misleading and seductive messages promoted by the porn industry:

1) Attractive and readily available females everywhere are endowed with augmented body parts that make them highly desirable and extremely seductive. Ordinary women who don't fit that stereotype, no matter how intelligent, gracious, compassionate, decent or kind they are, are second rate.

2) The world is full of beautiful women who are totally and enthusiastically focused on fulfilling men's every sexual fantasy. There is no limit to the frequency or varieties of pleasure they are eager to offer whoever wants it.

3) These fantasy figures demand nothing and expect nothing from the men they pleasure. They are willing to cater to their sexual needs with no questions asked and without any expectations of being treated with respect or loved and cared for as equal partners.

With that kind of mindset, is it any wonder we live in the kind of hookup and breakup culture we do, in which asking someone for a date is seen as a sign of a greater interest in a real relationship than is actually going to bed with them? Or should we be surprised that so many men act as though they are entitled to take whatever liberties they wish with women without any recognition of the harm they inflict?

I know that any talk of waiting for sex until people are truly committed to the covenant bond we call marriage is considered by some these days to be quaint and prudish. From my own experience, and from my observation as a marital and family counselor, however, I increasingly see it as just being prudent.

I have yet to see how today's commercialization of sex (with the US being one of the world's major producers and promoters of porn), accompanied by society's acceptance of commitment-free copulation without regard for the worth and dignity of the human beings involved, is really a viable path to"happily ever after".

On the contrary, I see it as a set up for some serious heartbreak, regret and remorse.